[Ever enlightening, ever entertaining — Ed.]
The Mongols lived north of China, in the mountains. Genghis Khan wanted to invade China but first, he had to…(a eat his lunch (b unite every Mongol tribe (c play football
B That’s right! So he said “Join me, for thou shall be killed if thou does not!” And they all did. So they invaded a city in China called Peking. Everyone was so scared they lay flat on their faces and surrendered without even fighting. Listen to this: “Mongol alert! There’s a Mongol here! Heeeeeelp our poor little city! Our children! Someone HEEEELP!” They even managed to go west and capture Islam!
[Is it safe to assume that someday Violet will be able to write in a serious voice? At this point as long as nothing is grossly inaccurate I just let it all go.]